Dear Dr. Prassad,
Its alarming the heaps of potential I have in me and I know this because its all I hear from everyone who knows me. I often have the most brilliant of ideas, some of them destructive but generally progressive ideas. but whoever cursed me did a good number on me because I must be one of the laziest people I know for sure. It takes massive effort for me to even sit up for long. most of the time, Im just reclined really and ever since I can remember, getting me out of bed was always a tag of war. I used to have these recurring dreams where I always 'woke' up and got ready for work and I normally woke up on my way to the breakfast table. Only to find myself still in bed and an hour late. Most people would panic and rush out, I always found a way to rationalise it.

And so my common phrase is, "If you are late, just be late properly. 5mins, 1hr, whats the difference, Late is late!" Thats when I hatch up an excuse and sleep a little more. I postpone everything to the absolute last minute and barely make my deadlines. I know what I ought to do, I have prayed about, if I believed in witchcaft, I would have given it a try as well.
Please Dr. how can I get off my lazy ass and realise the dreams I have always had? Is there a medical name for my condition and if so how can I possibly cure me of this acute laziness?
It is ruining my life, please help me get my life back. Or I will be forced into an occupation that keeps me on my back.

Thanks to Mafudian and Petesmama (Queen of Nose Bugaroli) , now I have to follow suit and reveal some of the things I have struggled so hard to keep under wraps.

First the Rules

1. We have to post the rules here

2. Players have to post 8 random facts/habbits about themselves on their blog.

3. Players then have to tag 8 other unfortunate sods and get them to do the same

4. The 8 get listed and informed to read my blog and the trend continues.

yesterday I watched the acclaimed feature film "The Secret" so I have a new take on life. Im trying to put everything I learned into practice and its for that very reason that Im going to list the 8 things I am most grateful for.

1. FREAK ACCIDENTS.

I honestly do not know anybody else who is more freak accident prone than me. Every scar on my body has the most bizzar story surrounding it. And its like Im always in he wrong place at the wrong time. And on several occassions I could have died but I have constantly defied deaf and it is really nothing short of a miracle that I am alive.

I feel pretty special that I am a twin. back in the day I would prolly be left for dead somewhere in the rain forest. But being born a twin in these times its pretty special. It gives my mum the Nalongo status that she is so proud of and often people ask me what it feels like to be a twin. In primary school, some kids even believed we had some sort of special power. Mbu we could turn into a flaming torch and burn anyone who caused us any distress. The bullies therefore treaded very carefully around me lest my wrath be unleashed upon them. So I used to feel like a super hero in those days, these days nobody believes me, darn!

Its next to impossible for people to be indifferent towards me and for that Im truely grateful. The ones who dont like me, really dont like me. And the ones who like me really like me. I am just too loud to be ignored. And its not my fault which brings me to No.4

Sometimes I think God should have just made me all mouth. Everyime I meet someone new, they almost seem intrigued that all that Voice is coming out of me. The very tactless ones end up imitating me right infront of me, as if! Many times they dont even hear what I just said, because the are more interested in the sound of my Voice. Ok, you can go purge now! enough bragging.

Apparently Im always thinking about how to make my next buck. At Uni. on one particular broke day, I came up with the brilliant idea of starting up a dating agency. I figured there was alot of lonely people who needed help. I called it Sirens (light bulb!) and the tag line was "Riders be bold". And we were in business for a while, we could finally afford to go out alot. Till a bunch of older guys saw this as an opportunity to get hitched to young, clueless campus gals. Just the idea grossed me out and my conscience won so we closed.

You prolly thinking this I should be a shamed of right? Nah, cowards live longer. I will bail on you if the other option will make me happier. In high school I wrote a play for my House competition that sucked, thats coz I was forced to. I dont think the play sucked that much, but the interpretation by the actors sucked (Im still not taking the wrap for it coz thats what I do). I secretly switched allegiance and joined another house. So the sucky play came last and I got to bull roast with the winning house. Even on a gals nite out, I will ditch you for a booty call.

Im a Librarian by profession. Thats what I spent alot of time in school doing, studying Deweys decimal Classifications. So for those who want to fufill their sexy Librarian fantasy, hola! We can role play and I will be good at it. I shelved that somewhere were it can gather dust, now Im a Business Development Manager.

I can drop it like a Video vixen. And Im not playing y'all. Lets meet on the dance floor if you dont believe me.

I got tagged twice does that mean I get to list 16 of them???? Anyway I have seriously run out of what to say. So I would like to hear from Aseu, Tandra, Edmo, Iwaya, Leosdarling, Lissingmink, wanderer, jumblemumble.

I hate waiting, I hate waiting people, I hate waiting for food, I hate waiting for sex, I just hate waiting. And here I am waiting, the agony of waiting worse than the monotony of the use of the word in this single post.

And let nobody tell me patience pays, coz it dont. By the time I get what Im yearning for, the excitement has bailed on me. so damn right Im not blessed with that virtue. Yet here I sit tapping my fingers on the table, and it better be over soon.

I OD'ed on long Island Ice teas this weekend, blame it on the waitor who didnt take it kindly that I bitched about my first order. I though the tanginess of the lime was missing and he must have heard.".....blah, glass is too small, blah....bigger glass....blah manager of this place." So instead of adding the missing ingredient, he brough my next order in a glass bowl.

My mouth dropped open just looking at the gu thing, it swallowed up the straw and the decorative lemon slice looked like a tiny blade of grass. Anyway I took it in my stride not to disappoint the crew. It is no wonder I didnt make it to work the next day, the darn thing gave me a tummy upset. Tandra, you is Lucky you werent there.

Some people wanted to feature so celeb endorsements. I met a few people this weekend who deserve special mention.

Reason for being the Reason and bitching{{{just had to add that}}}}

Whothaman, Whodaman aka C. E . Whore for being the crazy bastard that he is. The first man I ever saw who blacked out on the dance floor still standing.

Then the Nurse and his infamous bank bed story.

The poor white boy who said what he did at the wrong time and in the wrong place.

My sister for showing up unexpectedly and without knowing it prolly saved my life

And Mr back2basics for quitting way to early.

Will put all your plaques in the mail. Was nothing short of interesting, this phase Im going through.

But right now let me go back to waiting.

Pretty woman was the movie that elevated hookers a little, gave hope that love can indeed conquer all. This guy told me his business trips sometimes get so lonely that he is often tempted to drive by Speke road to pick up a companion was the word he used. of course I raised an

eyebrow and let him know that what he was looking for at Speke road wasnt companionship.

Here is his story, mbu het met a gal once at rock garden and they even discussed political issues in Congo. It was only after she mentioned her hourly rate that he realised she was a lady of the night. I read that off some horrid historical romance novel.

Anyway I was rather impressed at how seemingly knowledgeable this whore was. she obviously didnt have the hooker neon sign all over her and this bettered her chances at possibly baiting the big bad wolf into the cottage.

The stats are alarming as to the percentage of guys who solicit hookers. From what I hear, they have even broken down their rates as per service. Ugandans are becoming extremely resourceful people. I remember the first time I saw a phone booth or rather a stall and it had rates for "beeping" or "flashing" I thought that was funny. well that was untill this guys told me hookers have a similar service on speke road.

you see when you beep and by some rotten luck the other person picks up before you hang up, you will definately be charged the entire unit.

Now the hookers apparently offer jaribu, that means you are only allowed a dip. and you have to hold still coz God forbid you make any movement. Immediately there will be allegations of getting her all excited and leaving her hanging dry. Failure to pay will have them sounding an alarm and you dont want to draw any attention to yourself.

Just a warning to anyone who might want to go out seeing companionship.

Tick tock, tick tock!

We'll do it all

Everything

On our own

We don't need

Anything

Or anyone

If I lay here

If I just lay here

Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don't quite knowHow to say

How I feel

Those three words

Are said too much

They're not enough

If I lay here

If I just lay here

Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told

Before we get too old

Show me a garden that's bursting into life

Let's waste time

Chasing cars

Around our heads

I need your grace

To remind me

To find my own

If I lay here

If I just lay here

Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told

Before we get too old

Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am

All that I ever was

Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all

I can seeI don't know where

Confused about how as well

Just know that these things will never change for us at all

If I lay hereIf I just lay here

Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

For someone who just got over my deep water phobia, I seem to spend alot of time at the lake lately. Im not one for the beach bash afffair but on saturday, I joined a few new friends and old friends for their neighborhood party at the lake. Obviously the beach thing is a favourite past time for many Ugandans, as it turned out I almost knew everyone at the party next to ours. So when our food was delayed, I sold out and crossed over to where the food was being served.

I got to talking with this guy Yasmin from Bosnia working with UN who recently got posted to Nepal and the only thing I know about Nepal is the tragedy of the crown prince. Does anyone remember that story? I think it was in 2004, when Nepal was still an absolute monarchy. The crown prince who even went to Eton, comes back home, invites the entire family for a dinner and opens fire on them. Killed his mother, his sister, his father and a whole bunch of other relatives before he turned the gun on himself. Apparently he was unstable coupled by his parents refusal to allow him marriage to the girl he loved. Talk about doing stupid things for love. They claim he was manic depressive or something.

Then there was this one guy who has liked me for a long time and decided this was the night to drop hints. I pretended I had no idea what he was talking about. There was this other gal from Canada who was feeling his groove though. Wierd, when she started getting cosy with him, I got a little jealous. I know its selfish but I cant help it, suddenly he became more attractive now that some other gal liked him. I have a problem I know!

It was a nice party, had to unplug the music coz it was 2 am and nobody was keen on leaving except me. But it worked, soon we were all packed and on the road to Kampala.

I was in the salon yesterday and this music video from way back was on TV. Remember Hope Mukasa's "dont go". Oh my God! He looked so young and was slow motion running on the beach with some Ethiopian looking chic. I thought the song was still nice and the video even better than most videos i have seen lately.

Talk about bad videos, a month ago I went to Bukoto street to see a friend at his office and ran into these guys trying I think to shoot a music video. They had a tiny little video camera the size of my palm and looked high on some thing. one of those "bad man a rasta" types. Then the two gals I assume the video vixens were behind this shrub trying to worm there way into these skimpy clothes. So if you ever wondered how the bad videos are made, thats probably how.